Whether you’re new to sex or a vagina expert, fingering can seem somewhat intimidating… everyone has their own preferences, and hey, the anatomy is a little complicated. With these tips and tricks, you’ll be a pussy fingering pro.
1. Trim your nails
Shorter nails just tend to feel better inside a vagina. To avoid those little cuts and abrasions, keep your nails trim and tidy.
Oh, and in case your mother didn’t tell you, it’s also good manners to wash your hands before inserting them inside somebody.
2. Get her wet
If you ask me, finger banging is an under-rated art. When done right, it’s incredibly hot. Dry, fast, and furious fingering – not so much.
I think I can speak for all women on this. Fingering is uncomfortable if I’m not aroused first, since vaginal lubrication is essential for comfortable penetration. For some women, it may take 20 to 45 minutes to reach full arousal. So, be patient.
While foreplay often includes fingering, to be an expert at sex with your hands, think of fingering as another form of penetrative sex. Start with foreplay before inserting your fingers. Kiss, caress your partner’s breasts, touch her inner thighs, or do whatever arouses her.
3. Rub her clit
Before sticking anything inside her, take your index and middle fingers and gently rub your lover’s clit in circular motions, increasing speed and intensity gradually.
4. Use lube
Foreplay can get a girl wet, but there are other factors that can affect vaginal lubrication. Sometimes you don’t have 20 or 30 minutes, right? Women who are going through menopause experience vaginal dryness due to hormone changes. Some women experience vaginal dryness as a side effect of medications.
A pussy can be finicky. Sometimes, she just doesn’t get as wet as you would like. Thankfully, you don’t need to rely on natural lubricant, because there are plenty you can buy. Lube makes sex more pleasurable for lots of women, regardless of their age. So if your partner needs it, get some lube and enjoy. It’s worth saving her from a chafed vag, trust me.
5. Start with one finger
After she’s turned on, properly lubricated, and her clitoris nicely rubbed, she’ll be begging for penetration.
Start out small, with just one finger, and slowly insert it into her vagina. Use whatever finger she feels most comfortable with, but the best bet is the index finger or the middle finger. Think of the first finger as part of the intro to fingering, and slowly glide in and out while increasing in speed to tease your lover. The entrance to her vagina is the most sensitive part, so you really don’t have to go deep, yet.
6. Find Her G-Spot
When she’s ready, and her pussy is wet and opening readily for one finger, add one more. Using your middle and ring finger, stroke your partner’s g-spot area (the top wall of the vagina).
While in-and-out motions like a penis can feel wonderful, circular rubbing of the g-spot with a few deep strokes around her cervix is far better.
7. Use your words
While moans are usually a sign your partner is enjoying herself, there’s only one sure way to know: Ask her. Get specific. Is one finger enough? Do you want more? Am I rubbing too hard or too soft? Is this too intense, or are you close to orgasm?
Communication is key to successful sex, so occasionally ask your partner what she’s feeling.
8. Both hands, please
You don’t have to stop rubbing her clit once you start fingering inside her. After you’ve gotten both the clit-rub and g-spot fingering motions down, try them in combination.
9. Explore the rest her body
The clit and vagina are sensitive areas, and your partner may want a break at some point. You don’t need to be actually fingering her or rubbing her clit for the entire session. Keep your hand on her vulva, with a finger or two touching her labia, while using your other hand to caress her breasts or pinch her nipples.
Again, communication is crucial, because if she’s about cum from you rubbing her clit, you don’t want to suddenly stop. Or maybe you do, but we’ll save that for another article.
Sometimes, pulling your fingers out of her vagina, and taking a moment before inserting them again, can feel super hot. As in “Hey, I want more.”
They say sex is like pizza: When it’s bad, it’s still good. I disagree, especially when it comes to sex with your hands. A lover who gets me wet, builds it up, and skillfully uses their hands on my pussy? Mmmm, oh yeah!